Also, if your toddler is upset about something, your response should not be anger, it doesn’t help calm your already upset toddler.
However, Eanes does show us how to better calm our toddler with 25 tips that are actually quite interesting. Don’t be surprised if you find yourself using some of these tactics for your own soothing.
Small, but powerful tips are packed in this read.
Continue reading the remainder of the list and see a few things that can work as a dual prescription.
The first step in teaching children how to manage their emotions is learning to manage our own. If adults are easily upset and thrown off balance, their children will usually follow suit. Growing ourselves may be the hardest part of parenting. Many of us are simultaneously learning new skills and trying to teach them to our children.
In The Newbie’s Guide to Positive Parenting, I discuss the importance of owning our feelings and actions in chapter 6 and list several tools parents can use to calm their own upsets. I’ll share a few of these below:
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Choose a mantra to repeat to yourself (or out loud) when you are angry. Examples are “I’m capable of remaining calm” or “I am safe; there is no emergency.” I find it helpful to repeat the beginning of a children’s book I always read to my children when they were very little. This brings back feelings of warmth and calm for me.
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Do something physical. Splash cold water on your face. Jog in place. Put on some music and dance. Get outside for fresh air.
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If you feel the need to yell, use a loud, silly voice or make a “toot toot” noise while cupping your mouth with your hands. Don’t worry about looking silly to your kids. They’d rather see you look silly than look scary.
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1.Balloons stuffed with play-dough are fun to squeeze and a great way to release frustration. There’s a tutorial here at Somewhat Simple.
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2.Calm down jars are a very popular tool to calm children’s brains. Watching the glitter swirl and settle is soothing and shifts the brain out of fight, flight, or freeze and back to calm. You can find the instructions here at Instructables!
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3.Hug it out. A simple hug can go a long way.
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4.Mr. Mad Balloons are balloons with angry faces drawn on them that children can pop when they are angry. You can tell the child to pop the Mr. Mad Balloons and watch the anger deflate.
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5.Breathing strategies are beneficial for calming and resetting the mind. Meaningful Mama suggests teaching your child to blow out their fingers like candles.
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6.Jumping jacks are a good way to release the energy flooding the body with intense emotion.
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7.Use a visual chart that says “When I’m angry, I can…” and paste photos of your child doing a number of the activities listed here. Point your child to the chart when needed.
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8.Create a calm down area filled with comforting items, like the one I talked about in this post.
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9.Ask the child to draw a mad face on a piece of paper, and then let him rip it apart and throw it away.
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10.Hand her a coloring book and some crayons.
- For the other 15 techniques, go over to Rebecca Eanes at creativechild.com (click here)Article credit: Jessica Lucia
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